A guide to bad health 2 of 10

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and grain. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

Overheard

"Calm spreads, in the same way that panic does."
-- David Toresen, a senior resuscitation officer at St Mary's, London about the July 7 2005 London bombings.

184 days later

I don't know how, but the Werelab and I have reached the 6 month anniversary.

Somehow I wasn't expecting it (especially after the 8 hours of being dumped over Christmas (long story I won't go in to it here (well I might later on (but it will require many more brackets)))). After all if it wasn't for a mutual friend, Jo, bumping in to us 10 minutes after we met it wouldn't have happened.

That's the funny thing about meeting someone. Werelab missed Jo's birthday party, that I was at. I missed her production of Juliet (as in Juliet and Juliet since no Romeo was required) thus missing Werelab. Werelab walked past my house (pre-move) for about 2 years solid and we never met; live around the corner from where I work... the list goes on. If I hadn't met a friend at the bar when I walked in, the free seat I took later on wouldn't have been there...

Life is funny peculiar in her timing.

take care,
Will

Oh, the Werelab comes from our first movie together, Wallace & Gromit in The Curse of the Were-Rabbit. What would you like to Were in to. Werelab chose Were-Labrador, I chose Were-demon. I'm not too sure what that says about us.

A guide to bad health 1 of 10

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?

A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

(with thanks to the e-mailed jokes going around...)

The world's oldest profession?

"Sir," writes a Telegraph reader, "I am continually reading,
particularly of late, that prostitution is the 'oldest profession'.
This is not so. The oldest profession is that of a gardener, or
horticulturist. In the Bible, Genesis 2:8 reads, 'God planted a
garden eastward in Eden', and 2:15: 'Then the Lord God took the man
[Adam] and put him in the garden to tend and keep it'. I rest my
case."

Outsourcinging the outsourcing to the outsourcer

Oh my eyes have crossed...

According to RTE news the Minister for Enterprise, Trade and Employment, Micheal Martin, signed an agreement on scientific and technological co-operation with his Indian counterpart, Kapil Sibal.

It appears the many companies in India want to outsource some of their tasks to Europe. The Irish ministers want at least some of this pie. However, a lot of work is being outsourced from Europe (well, the UK) and the US to India. Which implied that the job chain is jumping from the US to India to Ireland or from the UK to India to Ireland...

Er, Hello guys. We're here. We can take some of this...

take care,
Will

Overheard

"You can't save time; only live it."

Stitch alarms

Sometimes the universe throws alarms your way.

For example last night I was up reading. When for no apparant reason, I heard interglatic gunfire at 1am.

It took me a while to figure out that the sound was comming from a box of books (I have lots of boxes of books. I need shelves.)

In the bottom of the box was a Lilo & Stitch toy I picked up in 2002. This toy was a rubber ball that makes noises when thrown. This ball has been sitting comfortably at the bottom of a box since I moved...

I don't know what set it off, but after stopping it (threw at wall) I figured it was the universes way to tell me that it was way past my bedtime.

Pity I can't get it to go off in the morning...

take care,
Will

Bizarre Books

Actually the odd titled books from yesterday are actually from the Bizarre Books book.

They work hard on it...

I'll leave this with a matching title...
Girls of the Pansy Patrol by May Wynne.

take care,
Will

Yes this is a real book....

The Librarian is just back from his book buying trip in London (this is not a joke, his nickname suits him far too well, he even has the red hair and the long arms... Oook).

While there he came across a list of odd book titles. All of them are real.
Some of them are available to buy.

Could I interest you in SCOUTS IN BONDAGE A Story of Boy Scouts in Strange Adventure.

shocked,
Will

Overheard

Overtures? There were entire symphonic movements, along with overtones, undertones, undertows, and a rip tide or two . . .

And so I'm back

Christmas and families. Bad combination, but on the bright side I get to meet up with people I've been out of contact with for, well almost a year.

HOwever I@m going to sum up the year with The Reuters Pictures of the year 2005 and the BBC's 100 things we didn't know this time last year.

take care,
Will